IT Fair 12-15 March 2009

IT Fair ... The fair where all goes for cheaper electronics and IT products ... The one most look forward to every 3 months for the best deal ...

It's also one fair that can draw the largest number of people to ... Unfortunately, due to unforseen circumstances, I had to go there everyday to check out on something ... Got myself a laptop by instalment plan ... Got Jeff a laptop haversack, laptop sleeve, external harddisk, laptop fan, etc ...

I am never gonna go to such fair, ever again if I can avoid ... I almost fainted in the middle of the traffic while trying to squeeze my way from booth to booth ... Traffic was so bad that it's skin to skin while trying to make my way around in the hall ...

I was especially disgusted seeing the amount of litter left by Singaporeans at the end of the day ... The were designated bins for recycling purposes ... Instead, leaflets, brochures conveniently left their grip and dropped to the floor as each visitor move around the halls ...

Should that be the behaviour of a community who have been taught in school and by many govt-run campaigns for not littering? ... No wonder we are labelled "Ugly Singaporeans" when travelling overseas ... Many took that opportunity to do things which are not allowed back home and disgusted the locals ...

I hope they will be more considerate at the next fair, holding on to the flyers till they spotted a recycle bin which were conveniently located at the entrances/exits ... There's no excuse for not being able to find a bin ...

Mum's Depression

Things thrown ... Slaps given ... Nasty words hurled ... Once sat on the kitchen window, with one leg on the outside ... Ready to leave all behind ... Right in front of my eyes ... Today ...

Once a strong, stubborn woman ... Now a depressed woman who can't control her thoughts, feelings and behaviour anymore ... Yes ... That's her, my mum ... Though she's still as stubborn as before ...

It was never easy to be a caregiver for someone suffering from long-term illness ... Especially an illness like Alzheimer's Disease which takes away one's memory bit by bit, very slowly ...

Everyday having to worry about his safety when out of sight, monitor his diet, prepare his medication, get scolded for helping him, bathe him, etc ... That's what she has been doing to dad for the last 3 years ...

Very often, frustration was taken out on dad by words or hitting when he doesn't co-operate with her ... Have mentioned to her that whenever she feels that she can't control her emotions anymore, just walk away ... Take a deep breath, then come back to the problem ... NO TIME is the answer ... Always claimed to be tied up with "housework" whereby what's left for her to do are basic cleaning of the house, washing of hers and dad's clothing and cooking (optional) ...

Tried so hard explaining to her the importance of taking care of her health too ... Deaf ear turned ... Tried talking to her nicely ... Not a word register in her mind ... Whatever others say is never right ... If scream at her, will threaten to commit suicide ... Wanna get a maid for her ... Rejected ... Says maid won't do job to her standards ... Will have conflict ...

Mum ... Please tell us what we should do so that you can feel happy again ... We cannot perform miracle on dad's condition for sure ... Want more money? ... I'm jobless now ... I still try my best to give you all I have ... We have all tried to adjust our schedule around you ... We have not left much housework for you anymore ... We would love to chat with you if only you dun become so defensive at every single conversation ...

Mum ... We will always be there for you ... You are never alone ... We all took on different responsibilities to ensure the family still function as normal ... Let's all work hand in hand to achieve true happiness, challenging all obstacles and emerge as winners ... Mum, we all love you ...

Daddy Is Still Aware ...

Last night Jacqueline and Merc dropped by to pass me back my shawl which was left in Luke's car the night of Jacqueline's birthday celebration ... They hoped we can catch up for kopi before Jacq returns to DXB this morning ... It was 12.10am ...

Tot I could sneak out for a short while ... Sigh ... Caught red-handed ... And surprisingly, it was dad who caught me! ... He heard me opening the door and asked why was I going out so late ... Wow! ... I'm impressed ... He knew how late it was ... But ... But ... But ... That would mean I can't go for kopi liao ... Sianz ...

Didn't wana upset anyone further after declaring cold war with mum for maintaining curfew on me since Jacq's birthday on 27 Feb ... Sign ... Good daughter or not? ... I really dunno ah ... Juz felt that since this time it was dad who has voiced out his concerns clearly, tot it's nice to show him some respect ...

How long can I tahan this? ... Sigh ...

It's never enough ...

Why did I come back? ... I'm starting to doubt my decision ...

I juz go back home ... Yes, it's 3.45am when I got home ... Mum heard me opening the door ... Before I can even close the door securely, she questioned what time it was ... Replied her the actual time and immediately she asked why I come back so late ...

Tried explaining to her that it was a very good friend's birthday who had helped in time of crisis ... Can't juz leave early isn't it ... She replied no matter what the reason is have to get back home by 12 midnight ... Even for a 34-yr old gal? ...

I' ve tried to stay at home as much as I can to minimize expenses ... I've been away on BKK from 16-24 Feb, thereafter I went to the hospital on 25 Feb ... Din dare to go out on 26 Feb ... Then it was Jacqueline's birthday today (27 Feb) ...

What more does she want? ... Stay at home 24-7? ... Juz can't believe it ... It's worse than a teenager's curfew ...

Ray of Light

Is Feng Shui really that powerful? Misfortunes have not stopped knocking on my door since after CNY 2008 juz cos my current bedroom's inflicted by Five-Yellow (五黄). How bad can it get?

Wrist injury in March (till now still not fully recovered), cancelled Spain trip in April due to the injury, head injury in August, Dad's deteriorating condition, almost kanna bashed when on LV in SIN in Oct, economic crisis which discounted my unit trusts value by more than 50%, 2nd planned Spain trip in Oct cancelled, Jeff' dad's passing, his mum's deteriorating health condition, many other hiccups, etc...

Never-ending ah ... 1 mth and 20 days to go till 2009's CNY ... Can I tahan till then? ...

I will continue to fight on ... The power of the Mystic Law has given me strength to brave all obstacles ... I have had soft moments when water therapy was better than retail therapy ... At least it only hurt the eyes and not the pockets ... After letting all emotions out, I regained hope that a ray of light will shine when I open my eyes ... No matter what the outcome may be, it tells me where my next mission is ...

Mum, thank you for your encouragement and prayers ... I am very sorry that things had not turned out well recently ... I am very sorry that I may not be able to let you live a comfortable life for a while ... Sis and Bro, my apologies that I have caused so much inconvenience to you recently ... Thank you very much for your support during my darkest moments ...

To my battlefront kakis, we wouldn't have come this far without your cheers and support ... Our most sincere gratitude to your patience, understanding and most importantly, your guiding light when we were lost ...

Can't wait for the new year to come and leave all unhappiness behind ...

Is It Still Justifiable To Stay?

Once a land full of opportunities, now many can't wait to get out. Why?

24-hr Salik ... 1-year rent paid upfront ... Rentals increase by 7% per year ... ID cards Dhs100 per year of visa validity ... Bureacratic regulations for everything from registering businesses to registering for childbirth in hospital ... Still unable to find a place without a hotel as landmark after 5 years here ... Getting charged for doing pushups in a park after jogging ...

While the weakened dollar is trying very hard to recover, cost of living here is getting higher ... I have been working here for 5.5 years and getting salary increment each year ... But the amount of money I bring home is still the same as my first pay check, even though my overall salary has increased by almost Dhs2k but due to the weakened dollar ... See how much I have lost? ... The exchange rate was S$1=Dhs2.12 in April 2004 vs S$1 = Dhs2.7 in Oct 2008 ... It is as good as not getting any pay rise for 5.5 years ...

When I first saw this place, I was amazed by how cosmopolitan it was ... Highrise buildings, good road conditions, multiculture communities, clean and modern airport, etc ...

Frankly, I did not do much homework before packing my bags and leaving for the airport bound for this part of the globe ... All I know was, I need this job and will brave whatever this place has in place for me ... Well, back then, I was glad I have made the right choice ...

I used to encourage anyone who inquire about working here to get out of their comfort zone and come explore the world ... Now, I hesitate to answer any inquiries ... My reply is always "this place is like Beverly Hills of Mid-E" ...

If your employer do not provide you with accommodation, transport allowance, medical insurance, etc ... Think twice about leaving your nest ... 1) It's hard to find a place within your budget in the area your want ... 2) It's better to drive than trying to flag for cabs esp. in places like Deira and Bur Dubai ... Chances are good provided you can spare 1 hour putting your arm out whenever an empty cab approaches ... 3) Wonder where the certs from the docs here come from? ... MBK printers? ... It always take me 1 mth to recover from a simple cough where back home, I'll get better in just 1 week ...

Of cos with the current economic turmoil, if you still have a job, hold on to it ... Companies are making all kinda excuses to downsize before they can justofy the act ... One friend has already been a victim after being loyal to her company for 4 years, declining headhunters and competitors' offers previously ...

Wishing all out there all the best and hold on to your belts tightly ... We never know when our heads at the edge of the axe ... But I always believe: When something's taken from you, something better is waiting for you out there ... Go reach for it and never turn back ...

Working for Who?

A friend told me she could not understand why I worked so hard for a company that do not appreciate my efforts ... My reply was I do not see myself as working solely for the company but also for my customers and myself ... The smiles on my customers gives me great satisfaction ... It means they have appreciated what little service I can do for them in a short period of time ... That I am able to make their journey a pleasant one ... A recognition to my performance too ...

Which one is better: dragging yourself to work or looking forward to going to work? ... The former is purely working for the sake of keeping the job but lack of fulfilment ... Eventually, you will come to resent what you do everyday ... The latter raises your life condition and gives you strong life force even before you start your working day ... No matter what amount of work given to you, you'll take it on with stride ... Just like how I handle a grumpy passenger with the biggest smile I can offer till he could not find anymore fault with me ...

Would you like to work for the sake of going to work cos it helps to settle your bills? ... Or would you like to make the best outta your work, looking forward to a fulfilling day no matter how tough it may be and also seeing your bank account grow? ...